Last week, while we were rushing to the computer lab to finish his poster, I told one of my completely overwhelmed students that I felt like I was, "just one paper jam from being fired", and we commiserated about how much we hate being that close on everything.
I spent some time walking home thinking about how thin the margins I'm working on here are-- of time, of professional competence, of family sanity-- and how I was going to blog about how I hate not having wiggle room.
Except it's not true. Well, it is true that I hate being so rushed going into lab that one paper jam can screw up my whole day.
But I had the paper jam. On a day when I was already late because Dianthus didn't want to get up. Because he had been in bed with us in the middle of the night. Because we'd had serious thunder storms all night. And I had hand-written the quiz instead of printing it because . . . and I arrived at worked soaked from hard rain pellets that I somehow didn't expect to start only a block from our house.
And that paper jam that put me over the edge made me give a quiz three minutes late.
I'm over-fed, loved, not about to be evicted and generally appreciated at work.
I've given some poor lectures recently, and I really hate giving poor lectures. And I've picked up Dianthus at 5:15 instead of 4:45 and I really hate doing that. And I've had too many meals of cereal and yogurt and I almost didn't get my April Fool's letter out and I haven't started a Hunger Games discussion and my younger son has too many teeth (6 at 8 months!) and tries to use them on everything and my older son needs to be made to sit down at dinner time and and and
And you'd better watch out. Because I'm just this close and with a little provocation I might slip.
And then I'd have to write the quiz questions on the board.
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4 comments:
Excellent! I have been feeling exactly the same way...on the edge of drowning! But really....is it all that serious, no. Thanks for the reminder.
Janet, I'm sorry to hear that you're overwhelmed as well, but always glad to be of assistance.
Don't drown. Enjoy the spring.
I hope you're able to find some time for renewal soon... That much stress doesn't sound fun, although it sounds like you're managing to keep it all in perspective.
Molly
I feel the same way! It is kind of like being in quicksand or in some kind of amazing race that never ends. It makes me think there is no such thing as work-life "balance", just acceptance and being okay with not being able to be a superstar at everything. But that is hard for us overachievers :)
P.S. Only you will know your lectures were poor. The students probably have no idea.
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